#1 - I knew there were others just like me who needed to tell their restraining order story.
#2 - To clear my good name and prove that I am not a "stalker"
#3 - To provided support and encouragement to others who have had a restraining order slapped on them.
My 6 year dating relationship is over, she has "moved on", and so have I.
Unfortunately, in Hillsborough County Florida, the sheriffs office maintains a web site where your arrest record is on display for all to see.
This makes it difficult, if not impossible, to meet somene else.
All they see is that you were arrested and charged with Aggravated Stalking and Violating a Restraining Order in Hillsborough County.
They never see that your ex girlfriend tricked you by living at your home, borrowing 4900.00 from me, making bank deposits for you, and calling you almost 100 times from her phone during the restraining order she had against you!
They never hear her saying "Chris, the restraining order is just a piece of paper, we can see each other, no one will know"
They never saw the TWO motions she filed to drop the restraining order, leading me to THINK I could trust her.
They never see the Hillsborough County Sheriffs Police Report with my ex admitting she allowed me to contact her, and that I even found her new apartment for her, and moved her into it!!
ALL this during a restraining order.
Nope, all the prospective new women I meet see is that I am a "stalker' and Iviolate restraining orders !
My case is FAR too complicated to explain w/o documented evidence to back up my side of the story.
So, I created this restraining order blog, and tagged my story under "Chris's Story".
My purpose is not to "get back" at my ex girlfriend, only to clear my name by presenting true facts, as I understand them.
Here I am posting on a free legal advice forum, asking for legal advice.
My purpose in creating this restraining order blog is shown below.
» TheLaw.com legal advice forum » Criminal Law » General - Criminal Law » Avoiding Slander - Harassment - Violating Restraining Order Charges
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10-23-2009, 11:43 AM #1
ka7niq
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Avoiding Slander - Harassment - Violating Restraining Order Charges
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Jurisdiction/Place: USA - Florida
I made this blog restrainingorderblog dot com to tell my side of the story.
In Tampa, anyone can go to the police website and see anything you have been arrested for.
I am having trouble finding a new relationship, because I look like a violent criminal.
In fact, my ex girl tricked me into violating the restraining order, to try and put me away!
CAN I publish my side of the story on my Blog ?
Can I* use her whole name, or just her first name, or maybe refer to her as my ex girlfriend ?
She lied in court, under oath, and I have a cancelled check made out in her name to prove it, along with court transcripts!
Can I show these on my Blog ?
Any tips to avoid getting in troouble, yet still save my good name ?
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10-23-2009, 02:09 PM #2
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Truth is an absolute bar to liable and slander. You can use her name, though I would be careful doing so. I would not tell people where she was and I would be careful not to appear to be trying to get people to contact her on your behalf.
But as far as telling your side of the story, tell away; tell the truth.
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10-23-2009, 02:41 PM #3
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jharris352
Truth is an absolute bar to liable and slander. You can use her name, though I would be careful doing so. I would not tell people where she was and I would be careful not to appear to be trying to get people to contact her on your behalf.
But as far as telling your side of the story, tell away; tell the truth.
I plan to use her name ONLY for what I can absolutely prove, like the check she wrote out, that I signed, and loaned to her during the restraining order.
I will show court transcripts of her courtroom testimony on my Blog.
Where I live, everybody knows everybody.
Everywhere I go, I get asked "Why did you stalk a woman, or violate an order for dating Violence ?
It is way too complicated and time consuming to explain to each and every person.
I just figured I would point them to the blog, and allow them to decide for themselves ?
I am not trying to ruin her name, just protect mine.
People need to know IMHO that IF she was so "scared" f me, what was she doing living/borrowing money/working for me, etc, etc, etc.
Several people SAW us constantly together during the restraining order.
The hillsborough county florida victims assistance advocate, and the states attorney BOTH knew all about it!
Yet, getting their conviction was more important then examining the facts of this case.
IMHO, the facts are "If she was so "scared" of me, why was she still with me, during all of this ?
Right now, in my town, I am a stalker, as far as many are concerned.
I hope to show on my blog, that she is a liar, and prove it with facts.
IOW, tell and SHOW the truth, backed up with facts!
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10-23-2009, 03:11 PM #4
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Were you convicted of something?
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10-23-2009, 03:23 PM #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by raskalnikov
Were you convicted of something?
Yes, well, I was so overcharged, and bond was set at 200,000.00, that I was facing financial ruin sitting in jail.
I was charged with 12 violations of a restraining order basically, but in tampa, the third violation is upgraded to felony aggravated stalking!
So, I faced two felony aggravated stalkings, and 8 misdemeanors.
I was looking at 10 years in Prison, and NEVER harmed her in any way, except to call her, while she was calling me!
It is my opinion, something is wrong with a Law designed to "protect" a woman, that allows her to sleep, live, eat, work for me during a restraining order, but arrests me when ever she sees fit ?
That is exactly what happened to me!
Yes, my stupidity, I already know.
I am currently on 3 years misdemeanor probation, and the no contact order is still in place.
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10-23-2009, 03:31 PM #6
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Yah, this seems to happen all the time. The law is in favor of women in a lot of ways, sentencing, child custody cases, and as you are now aware, restraining orders/etc.
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10-23-2009, 04:19 PM #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by raskalnikov
Yah, this seems to happen all the time. The law is in favor of women in a lot of ways, sentencing, child custody cases, and as you are now aware, restraining orders/etc.
There is msomething wrong with a law that grants a woman a restraining order, based on her fear, yet when she demonstrates she is not scared of you by living with you, contacting you, etc, etc, you can still go to jail!
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10-23-2009, 04:42 PM #8
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I have always thought that restraining orders should be a two way street. If you don't want him around you, then you should not voluntarily be around him.
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10-23-2009, 04:49 PM #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jharris352
I have always thought that restraining orders should be a two way street. If you don't want him around you, then you should not voluntarily be around him.
Exactly!
How can you swear under oath, you need protection, yet have a relationship while a restraining order in still in place ?
This is what the victims assistance advocates and man hater groups do to a woman.
I will admit to yellaing at her, a time or two, but never in a threatening manner.
And NEVER did i put my hands on her, or hurt her in any way physically.
I am convinced she was coached into deceiving me, so I would violate the restraining order enough times to be sent to Prison!
I THOUGHT that the States Attorney in Hillsborough County Florida would see through this crap, and not prosecute me.
How wrong I was !
This law must be changed!
I am all for protecting women.
But IMHO, a restraining order shouild be declared null and void the minute she contacted me, much less moved IN with me ?
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Restraining Order Blog is not meant to harass, directly or indirectly contact, harm, imtimidate, bring any emotional distress, stalk or cyberstalk, nor intentionally slander or damage any individual in any way.
Nor is it intended to initiate any third party contact on behalf of any poster or author, or violate a current restraining order in any way. If you feel there is anything on our Restraining Order Blog that is slanderous, untrue, or illegal, please bring it to our attention. Our Restraining Order Blog Legal Staff will examine your request promptly, and any post you find offensive will be reviewed and possibly removed in a timely mannner
I went through something similar almost 3 years ago in Lee county. My now ex and I got into a loud verbal argument. Her 12 year old daughter called police and I was arrested for domestic violence. Upon release my ex got a restraining order for her and my 5 year old daughter. I couldn't understand how I was supposed to save my marriage with a 1 year restraining order and while intoxicated one night, I called and left her 15 VM's begging for this to stop and to let me fix our marriage of 8 years. I was arrested the next day for violation of restraining order.
ReplyDeleteA month later, she started calling asking if I could email her resume and other various BS reasons. The last time, we got into an argument and just before she hung up, she laughed and said "HA! have fun back in jail MFer". I was arrested for 2nd violation of restraining order the next day and also violation of probation for the initial DV charge that I plead out to.
I spend 115 days in jail and was served divorce papers while in jail. I was taking it to court when the day before, they offered me credit for time served on the VOP and 1 year probation for the other 2 charges to run concurrent, so I took it. I found out shortly after I got out, that my ex had met a guy and moved to North Carolina with my daughter when this started and had no intention of showing up for court, which would have meant all charges dropped.
I have taken her back to court on my own, since I can't afford an attorney for Contempt because she moved illegally and without permission, but it's a joke without a lawyer.
She has been there for a little more than 2 years now and I have seen my daughter 3 times in that time.
The system was manipulated by a woman who had nothing but revenge on her mind and still does to this day.