Anger and Near Death Experiences

How I was wired up to machines

I went into a 45 beat Vtac and nearly died!

Being angry with someone over a failed relationship is much like pissing in your own pants. The person who feels it the most will usually be you.
I recently had a major heart attack. It started out on my second date with a girl I met who lives 50 miles away. I went up to her place to take her to dinner on our first date. It went well, and so she came down here from New Port Richey Florida to spend the day with me this last Sunday. We went to the flea market, hit some yard sales, and then drove down to Apollo Beach to eat lunch at Circles in Apollo Beach. We were watchiung some movies at my house with my Son and his girlfriend, when it felt like I had indigestion or gas. I got up, and ate some Rolaids and Tums, but still it did not go away.  My Date asked me to look for some stuff on Ebay for her, so we went to my bedroom where my computer is, and shopped Ebay. She is diabetic, and did not feel well, and asked me if it was ok to lie on my bed. I said yes, and laid down beside her. The gas got worse, so I went to throw up, thinking it was something I ate ? She reminded me we both ate the same thing. I still made myself vomit till there was nothing more to throw up, and came back to lie down. She told me I looked terrible, and she had to drive all the way back home,  it was 11 pm. She left with concern for me. I tried to lie down, but the pain kept getting worse! So, I drove myself to Brandon Hospital, and they admitted me right away. They wired me all up, and gave me a nitroglycerine patch and blood thinners. The patch opened up my arteries, and the pain left. They also checked cardiac enzymes, and I SEEMED fine. They moved me out of ER, awaiting a bed in the cardiac care unit. I went to sleep, and was awakened to a team of 8 people with lidocaine shots and shock apparatus. They said my heart went into a 45 beat Vtac, a death rythym  and moved me right back to intensive care ER.  They wired me with shock receptors. I heard them talking outside the ER, they called a Priest for last rites!  They fully expected me to "not last the night", and said so. This scared me even more, as I was confronted with dying, alone!  I did not awaken anyone at my house when I left for the hospital, no one knew where I was. I started to pray, and ask God to forgive me of my sins. I did not hear a voice or anything like that, but I got this persistent thought that kept telling me "How can I forgive you, if you do not forgive others" And so, I decided to forgive some people, again. Actually, I had forgiven them already, yet they came back into my life recently to intentionally deceive and double cross me. It took me literally being on my deathbed to do it again, but I feel relieved it is done.

Showing a Cardiac Stent being installed

I did last the night, and went up to the cardio floor the next day. The nurse practicioner from the cardiac group came to see me, and told me  they wanted to inject die in my heart, and wanted me to sign permission for open heart surgery or a stent. I was scared, so I said no. She left, and returned with the Cardiologist who assured me I was lucky to be alive, had a major cardiac event, and would not survive another that was certain to come if they did not act right away. They found 95 percent blockage, and put in a drug coated stent . I must take Effient. a super expensive blood clot preventer like Plavix for a year.
The Cardiologist asked me about Stress in my life, and told me it must all be eliminated. I am also diabetic, and he told me we must get close control of both my blood pressure and sugar. He advised me to apply for Social Security Disability. I have had a LOT of stress lately that I am sure did not help my condition. I can not afford any anger or stress in my life, and have acted to eliminate anything that was causing it.